It is very alarming that the divorce rate in the church is the same as it is in the world. Many well known church ministers have gone through divorce at least once in their life time. Quite a number have gone ahead to remarry even when their ex spouses are still alive. On the other hand, some ministers of God believe that they will excel better in ministry without their spouses. This thought is a great deception from the enemy.
Is divorce the right way out of a terrible marriage? What is the mind of God about all this?
Job (the rich righteous man in the bible) did not divorce his wife even though she told him to curse God and die when he was going through trials. When Job overcame all his trials, it was the same wife that gave birth to the 2nd set of children that he had.
God sees married couples as one body and not two. Therefore, he expects them to look out and pray for each other. When you are praying for your husband or wife, then you are praying for yourself. Their honour is your honour. If you do anything to dishonour your wife or husband, then you are shooting yourself in the leg.
The husband is the head and his wife is the body. If the head is not functioning well, the body will feel it. If the body is not functioning well the head will feel it. It is not possible for the head to move without the body and neither can the body move without the head. As a result of this, they must be united in their decisions and actions. They must relate to each other in love. Anything done outside of love is not pleasing to God. It will be very difficult to love your husband, if you do not know and experience the love of God. Do you really believe that God loves you unconditionally? Do you believe that He loves you in spite of yourself? Knowing the love of God must be your prayer. The more you have the revelation of the love of God, the more you will love your spouse.
Ephesians 5:25 & 28 – “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loves his wife loves himself”.
Ephesians 5:22 – “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord”.
I have written this blog not because my marriage is perfect but because it has been much better by applying the word of God. I was in the bath a couple of months ago, when I noticed that the lower end of the shower curtain was very dirty and had become brown in colour. The first thought that came to my mind was to throw it away and buy another one. However I changed my mind and decided to soak it in a bleach solution. I did this and to my amazement, the shower curtain came out as new within 10 minutes.
Maintaining the shower curtain saved me the trouble of going out for shopping and I was able to avoid needlessly spending money. Almost immediately, the Lord drew my attention to my marriage. He said it needs to be maintained with the word of God. Every marriage needs to be maintained by the word of God. The word of God has been likened to water that cleanses. It is necessary to declare what the word of God says about your marriage. Within a short time, you will be surprised by the transformation that takes place. This is because the word of God is living and it has the ability to reproduce itself wherever it is applied in faith.
Ephesians 5:25-26 - (NKJV) "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word".
If the church is made holy by the power of the word of God, likewise every marriage can be made holy by the power in the word of God. From the above passage, you will realise that it is Christ that cleanses the church by the word of God. So, it is the responsibility of the husband to cleanse his marriage continually with the word of God. The wives can do this together with their husbands or even do it alone if their husbands have not yet had the understanding of the word of God.
Wives can confess these bible verses regularly
My husband loves me as Christ loves the church (Ephesians 5:25)
My husband loves me as he loves himself (Ephesians 5:28)
Our marriage bed is not defiled (Hebrews 13:4)
My husband has the mind of Christ (1Corinthians 2:16)
My husband has left his parents and has now clung to me (Genesis 2:24)
I have a covenant of love with my husband (Malachi 2:14)
My husband’s body belongs to me alone (1Corinthians 7:4)
Husbands can confess these bible passages regularly
I love my wife as Christ loves the church (Ephesians 5:25)
I love my wife as myself (Ephesians 5:28)
I have left my father and mother and now cling to my wife (Genesis 2:24)
I am now one with my wife (Ephesians 5:31)
My wife respects me (Ephesians 5:33)
Our marriage bed is undefiled (Hebrews 13:4)
My wife has the mind of Christ (1Corinthians 2:16)
I have a covenant of love with my wife (Malachi 2:14)
My wife’s body belong to me alone (1Corinthians 7:4)
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